YES I Am Sure...I Think
In today’s workforce, we have team members with varying levels of belief about what they deserve. Much of this belief falls along generational lines. Our Boomers were taught they must start at the bottom and work their way up. With the GenX generation, we began to see an increase in the number of college graduates, and while they expected to have growth opportunities every 2-3 years, they did not expect to start at the top. We began to see a shift in that belief with the Millennial generation (please don’t think this is a knock against millennials, it isn’t!) and those entering the workforce in the early to mid-2000’s, in my opinion entered with unreasonable expectations. They often came straight from college and expected the corner office with a 6-figure salary within a year of joining an organization, and if they did not get it they often sought new opportunities. I’m not sure we completely know what to expect from GenZ yet but based on what I see from my own children, I am inclined to believe they may be a blend of Boomers or Xers.
Over the course of my career, I have had the opportunity to work with many high performing leaders. It is interesting to me how many of those high performers around my generation continue to question their abilities. They place limits on themselves by not feeding their belief.
I’ll use myself as an example. When I received my first promotion into leadership, I recall the first week going home almost in tears. I questioned if I made the right decision jumping into leadership. Fast forward two years to the next promotion, I did the exact same thing. I even recall telling my husband I was concerned I might lose my job. That fear did not come from any particular event or reason, I wasn’t being counseled for performance, but somewhere in my mind I had this fear of failure. I didn't believe in myself. But because of my tenacity and competitive nature, I worked harder to be better, and I grew as a leader.
Over the course of the next two and a half years, my belief in myself also grew. In fact, it grew to the point I found other high performing leaders coming to me for counsel about career opportunities. You might contribute those conversations to the trust that had been established, but I believe it was also attributable to the belief I portrayed in myself. I had learned the art of being a duck.
Some of you may have heard this analogy before, and some may be wondering what a duck has to do with belief. I saw this graphic probably about halfway through that three-year stint mentioned above and it showed a duck gliding gracefully across a pond. It appeared on the surface the duck was moving with little effort, but the next image showed what was happening beneath the water, and there you saw a very different image. When ducks want to move, under the surface their feet are moving furiously. From the outside looking in, one may think the duck has it together but what you don’t see is the force and effort they put into their movement. That analogy resonated with me and helped me to learn it is ok to sometimes feel out of control on the inside but projecting a humble confidence in yourself build other’s confidence in you and when others have confidence in you, it flows back around to help you build an even greater belief in yourself.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve used this visual image when advising or coaching others. I had a nursing director who had become a close colleague and peer approach me just before I left one hospital for a new promotion. She wanted to brainstorm about two promotional opportunities she had in front of her. She was a superstar in her role. Her staff loved her; her patients received exceptional care, and her leaders valued and trusted her. As I listened to her, I could see she had the potential to talk herself out of one or both of the opportunities. She talked about how she had found great success in the role she then held and feared a move could be detrimental to her career. She even asked, “what if I can’t do the job?” As we continued talking, what we discovered was it was a belief issue causing her to pause. I recall asking her a simple question “When have you ever failed in your career?” I was not asking about making mistakes, all leaders make mistakes, and great leaders learn from them. What I wanted her to tell me was about a time she had truly failed.
I already knew the answer, which was she hadn’t; and she humbly acknowledged that to be true as well. With the next comment/question, she was able to gain the clarity she needed to pursue the promotion. No surprise, she got the job and her bosses are pursing her for another big promotion now!
I want to encourage anyone who is a high performing leader (yes, high performers know they are high performers, while low performers just think they are and likely don’t have many promotional opportunities in front of them) looking at a promotion but being held back by limited self-belief to consider the same thing I asked my peer and ask yourself, “Then why would this new, bigger job be any different?”
Friends, don’t let doubt keep you from going for what you want. With each new opportunity, you’ll have growing pains, but if you are a high performer who is willing to work hard at success, remind yourself you’ve not failed to this point in your career1 Then go be a duck until you become great at the next big challenge.
